C is for Coffee

Coffee is more than a beverage for me . . .

Coffee is a quiet time in the morning.
Coffee is a walk with my hubby holding hands (still after 21 years) to get a treat down the street.
Coffee is a shared passion with my wifey.
Coffee is a loving child making it for us on the weekend so we have that amazing aroma to wake up to.
Coffee is a total addiction.
Coffee is a time out from a busy day, a stressful moment.
Coffee is a visit with friends.
Coffee is amazing.

B is for Brother

I have a brother.  Most of my closest friends don't even know I have this particular relative.  When they see a picture of him or hear me talk about him the seem shocked.

My brother is 18 months older than me.  Growing up we were 2 school grades apart.  He was shorter than me (which pissed him off) and was also really natrually quiet, charming and very popular.  He understood the social game that I never did. 

Basically I was a bit of an embarassment to him - I was tall, heavy, geeky, loud, and had strange friends.  He never could just talk to me at school.  We kinda pretended we didn't know each other - it was easier on him.

Since leaving school we have really drifted apart.  He came to my wedding, I went to his.  He is an amazing uncle to my kids when he sees them.  He has recently separated from his wife and we exchanged a brief text conversation. 

I am not sure he will ever figure out how to speak to me - I just don't fit his mould of what I should be.  He is the golden child of the family because he has been successful in the material aspect of things.  He has done all the correct things, has money for vacations, is a neat freak, etc. 

If we met in a social venue we would never connect on a social level.  The only thing that connects us is DNA. 

I hope that his new life will make him happy.  I have nothing but the best of thoughts and wishes for him.  I really wish that things were different between us and I have tried - he is just not receptive.

A is for Atypical

Atypical - a word that usually brings up thoughts of 'not normal' or 'different' but really it is a word I really enjoy.  I live an atypical life.  My relationships, my spiritual views, my parenting style, my views on life in general are atypical if you pay attention to mainstream media.

The things that I view as atypical in my life . . .
- there are 3 people in my relationship with standard and bdsm dynamics
- my 14 year old daughter is able to stand up to friends and not crumble to peer pressure
- my 13 year old son has anxiety, adhd, dyslexia, dysgraphia and borders the autism specturm enough to have the behaviors but not the diagnosis
- my husbands father lives with us and is the cause of a lot of marital stress
- I am a pagan and on a pretty intense spiritual journey
- we participate in mediveal recreation and I have a slight (ok huge) obsession with textile realated stuff
- and there is more . . . .

Now, my life is just my life.  I don't look at it as anything other than my reality until I start trying to explain it to someone.  It is their reactions of shock, confusion and all the questions of 'how does that work?' that make me realize how different it is. 

My entire life I have not followed the mainstream on anything.  I think I caused my mother to go grey at a young age with my piercings and my hair and my makeup.  She was very patient with me but she still doesn't understand me or my life. 

For many years I didn't understand why everyone couldn't just accept me for who I am because I accept then for who they are (another atypical response).  I have finally had to accept that not everyone is able to just accept others as they are.  I can do that, it makes sense to me.  So I just live my life.  If others choose to be part of it then I welcome them in. 

Now - for the rest of my day I get to think about what my 'B' post will be about tomorrow . . . BDSM, Brother, Boredom . . . .

Saturday Mornings

I really love quiet mornings.
Wifey is at work.
Hubby is sleeping.
Son is playing on FB.
Daughter is relaxing and watching a movie.
Father in Law has retreated to his room.

This allows me a few minutes of "ahhhhhhh" in my day to drink hot coffee and think about what I have to get done.

Today's exciting adventures include laundry, sewing dance costumes, sorting out my music studio, baking and cooking, and hosting a couple friends who have generously offered to come and assist with some vehicle repairs. 

As much as I usually think my chaotic life is 'normal', these quiet mornings are rare and allow me to become way more centered and focused about what I need to do. 

Before I do anything else - turn up the heat and pour more coffee!!!

The daughter's boyfriend

Our 14 year old has a lovely boyfriend.  She keeps many of her friends away from the house because her younger brother drives her nuts and she is also not sure how to explain that she has a dad and 2 moms who all live and sleep together.

So - yesterday we took the plunge and explained the poly nature of our relationship.  He said he kinda figured it out already and he didn't care.  He then helped make dinner, ate with us, helped clean up and walked her over to her friends house. 

I have to say it was a wonderful experience for her to have.  This young man is quite lovely and sweet to her.  He is far more ready for this relationship that our daughter but he is being very respectful and going at her pace.  I think he knows that she would squish him like a bug if he doesn't.

This has brought up many things for me.  The whole poly relationship really isn't that weird to people.  The popularity of Sister Wives and Big Love has captivated the interest of many people.  What confuses them is that we are a triad, we are all involved with each other.  That seems to make them more accepting and bend their brains all at the same time. 

We are never overtly public with affection, ok sometimes we are, and it is always up to the kids to tell their friends and share with who they want to share with. 

We have been living this way for over 3 years now - it is amazing how much my life and my perceptions of life have changed.

In addition to acceptin my sexuality, my kinky side and battling my jealousies I have also developed a hightly spiritual side which takes me on another completely differnt journy.  RIght now that journey involves completely decluttering my environmnet and living with less. 

I have always teetered on that hoarding behavior of hanging onto things because it has an emotional attacment or I may need it someday.  I have blown through that and am purging like a mad woman!  It feels awesome.

I am really looking forward to this weekend and getting rid of more stuff!!!

Ice Cream and Gummy Bears

This combination is a particular favorite of mine - with chocolate syrup.  I have no idea why I think the idea of super cold and chewy gummy bears is good - but hey, it works!
On Sunday was my son's 13th birthday.  He didn't want cake - he wanted banada splits (banana optional as he just really wanted ice cream and candy toppings). 
SO . . . I forget that I have had jaw surgery in the last 4 months and think that eating my favorite combination is a good idea . . . .

Let me tell you this - it was a BAD idea.  It was an even worse idea to do it again 2 days later . . . .

The left side of my jaw is soooooooooo sore. 

Serves me right . . .

Blogging A-Z Challenge

Going to give this a shot . . . . 2 days until it starts!